Silence of the night

I wonder why bed-time brings serenity. Retrospecting on the events of the day is the most common thing the one finds oneself in. The calmness of the night at the end of the day allows you to contemplate life more clearly. Thoughts are more free-flowing. It may be because of the silence around. Silence is very soothing, even joyful at times, specially when you are constantly always listening to something: noise, music, chatter, buzz, horns, throughout the day. The silence of the night takes you away from all this clutter and fills you with tranquility.

In such silence, the thoughts are profoundly clear. You can find the most satisfying answers to some of the most perplexing questions. An idea suddenly occurs. A plan formulates. Hope usurps. Fears quietened. A favourite song, long forgotten, comes to the lips. The mind rests. The heart then takes over. Such a state is the most peaceful. Then sleep descends.

Of movies, books and cooking

Well, keeping with my trend of posting daily, here goes. I want to stop wallowing in self-guilt, so, I’ll ramble about how I spent my weekend.

I watched Valu (the wild bull). It’s a Marathi movie about how a wild bull in a certain interior village in Maharashtra is harassing its villagers. It is a one theme movie that takes you to the interiors of a village in Maharashtra and aptly portrays the lifestyle, language, and attitude of those people. The most endearing thing in this movie is its characters. It’s highly recommended as a must watch. I also watched Gangajal (yeah yeah.. I don’t go into the kitchen and don’t work!) Did you check out who that gal was doing the item number? Wait…Maanyata!! Apna munnabhai’s wife (?) It’s of course a very good movie.

Apart from being glued to the idiot box, I tried to develop my culinary skills. I prepared Schezwan Prawns Crack Rolls and Schezwan Chicken Fried Rice. Ok, it’s not all that difficult if you have the Schezwan sauce ready at your disposal, (which by the way, my aunt was so kind to have prepared and given me). So one up, to impress my in-laws and to win a man’s heart through his stomach!!

Oh and how could I miss, I have been reading Jane Eyre!

Basking in love

I spent a long relaxed morning in the beauty parlour. It was so very peaceful. I have been going to this parlour for more than a couple of years now. The head beautician who owns the parlour is rather sweet, especially on me, I think. She spent a little more time than usual working on my facial giving me an extra massage.

How sweetly all people treat you once you are married. It was like her daughter had come home and she was giving her a nice massage. Your people whom you knew before marriage are rather sweet on you and take that special extra effort to treat you and make you comfortable. They will tend to fuss over you a little more than required. There is this extra bit of attention, concern and thoughtfulness. And being a woman you can always make that out. These people have this “I-understand-have-been-through-it-all” look in their eyes when they hear you talking. I think it reminds them of their own past and how it was for them.

It is like basking in the love of all these people and it feels like you have just got so many “mothers” looking after you. It is amazing to feel so loved and cared for.

Finally..at home!

I am finally at home and writing this sitting at my very own PC. It just feels great. My home, my bed, my PC, my things which are kept just the way I left them and just they way I want them to be.

Old habits die hard. I was amazed to find myself so at ease working my way around at home. It was as if I hadn’t been at my in-laws’ place at all. It was so very relaxing to come home and just lie down and leave all the rest to mum. Dear god of all good things! I came home, changed, freshened up and just lied on the bed. Mum was taking care of my things. It’s so good to have someone finish up after you; specially when it’s mum who’s doing the stuff.

I wondered why I felt all the more sleepy after coming here, it’s because I feel more relaxed physically and mentally.

The positive side of travelling

Yesterday evening, I again spent 2 and a half hours travelling. It was pure torture. The constant honking and the pollution was getting on my nerves. To add to this, the driver wanted to listen to the radio full on which further added to already rising anxiety.

Finally, I plugged in my iPod, tied my favourite scarf and tried to get some sleep. Sleep…aah, how very relaxing that was. The only good thing that I find in all this traveling is the amount of sleep I get to catch up on. It’s not like the deep slumber of night. It’s light, often interrupting but alas..it is sleep!

Now, I look forward to the traveling in the car to get some sleep while listening to the soft songs in the background, and gather my thoughts for the day and make up my mood. After marriage, life had become suddenly fuller with no time or space for me. This traveling time is time alone with me; to reflect on the day that passed, to muse, to feel serene, and to take in the morning sunshine, to feel the cool air, to just relax and be me! I like it most when one of my favourite songs plays on the radio channel and I keep humming along. It is pure bliss!

The Happy Weekend

After many weeks of socializing and attending family get-togethers, last weekend brought about the much needed relaxation and rest! Finally! Hubby and I had gone out on Friday evening. I slept in late on Saturday and spent the day relaxing and catching up on my sleep. We again went out in the evening, this time to watch a movie! The movie was nice though the most I enjoyed was spending time with him alone.

We came back home pretty late and watched yet another movie on TV. And this one was more exciting than the one we watched in theatre. This is my way of spending the weekend and I totally enjoyed it. Sunday morning too, I slept in late and spent the day reading and listening to music. This was the weekend I enjoyed the most after marriage! I hope I get to spend more weekends in this manner. Fingers crossed.

Just Another Day

Travelling was a bit peaceful today. My father-in-law dropped me to my office in our car. I slept most of the time listening to my favourite songs on iPod. Travelling in car was all the more comfy when compared to my yesterday’s journey. I am relaxed today since I would be going to my old home today evening which is hardly any distance from this office.

The workload is minimal and as I understand there won’t be much pressure and the work schedule would be comfortable. I am well…just happy and looking forward to going home tonight 🙂

Frenzied Weekend

Ok, so my weekend was not all that peaceful in terms of lots of sleep, relaxation and rest. I have been having very many busy weekends after I got married. Either we all go out for some family function or some family get together and majorly go for marketing. This weekend we had hosted a Ganesha puja. The preparations took a long time. When all the relatives came, people were occupying almost every nook and corner of our home.

I am not into these puja things, but nevertheless it felt peaceful. I was very tired would be an understatement. Dragging myself to office today was the most painful thing that I had to do.

Sleep

The late night movie last night didn’t go down well. Thank goodness that I didn’t get an acidity attack this morning. The lack of sleep over the weekdays has a compounded effect on my sleep and last night just added to it. I got up feeling like a zombie. Am walking around half asleep and now even my eyelids are paining at the slightest movement. My eyes are red, swollen, and watery. I also have a mild headache.

Am racking my brains to create a proper sleep timetable but to no avail. The crazy working hours that my husband and I put in hardly leave us with any time for each other and we end up staying up late at night catching up on the events of the day. This adds to the frustration. Also, I don’t find time to read my books and listen to music as much as I did earlier. Life isn’t as spaced out as it was once.

I had a strange dream that I was running after my best friend through the fields and kept getting obstructed by cattle on my way. He was near at first and within reachable distance but slowly as the dream progressed, he went fay away from my reach, slowly fading out of my sight. I remember feeling sad and disheartenend when I woke up. Is this a sign that he would go away from my life?

The getaway

It was a couple of weeks back on a Friday; I was sitting at my desk bored with no work. It was soon after lunchtime and I was waiting for the clock to strike 6 so that I could go home. It was then that it struck me…the adventurer in me saw an opportunity. I made some silly excuse at office and left. I was going to a mall to browse through some books and watch the latest movie.

At around 2 pm, I reached the mall and stood in the line to buy the ticket. Alas! The tickets were all sold out since it was a hit movie. I went to the huge bookstore next to the ticket counter. I had heard that this was a huge store with all types of books. My excitement knew no bounds as I lazily strolled from section to section, read the names of all my favourite authors and found books that I wanted to read from a long time.

The best part was, I could pick up any book, sit on a comfortable couch and read it. No compulsion to buy it! How lovely. I browsed through all the sections from science fiction to children’s poetry to books on weaving and candle making. I finally sat down with my favourite mystery writer’s book at the cafe inside the store drinking a hot cup of coffee.

The thrill of it all lied in the fact that no one at home, not even my hubby, knew about this escapade of mine. I sat there for more than three hours finishing the book. I returned home at the normal time with a couple of my favourite books tucked away nicely in my bag.

The intention was not to deceive…but to find peace. To feel free to be myself, do as I wish and be where I want to be. Lately I had been feeling trapped in the day to day chores of life, obliging responsibilities at home and at work. This experience gave me the much needed sense of peace and freedom…to just be..